…and beware of jocks dressed in geek’s clothing…
I’ll tell you a secret, one we should have all learned in high school, or even before, when we were young enough to absorb it and make it a part of ourselves. While you might lean towards going with your heart, you have to know what it is your heart wants. And what it needs. What’s popular shouldn’t be part of the equation.
That Jock? The guy who fits the stereotype so well it’s as if it were based on him? Graduation for him means the end of his glory days. It means the end of always being Mr. Perfect. Getting what he wants when he wants. He’ll spend the rest of his life looking back on how great high school was. He’ll dwell on when he was the hero. That last second in-the-end-zone catch that won the state championship. High school for him was as good as it’s ever going to get, but he’ll spend the rest of his life alternating between swimming in those memories and trying to recreate them. Life will be work and sports, filling in all his free time with a pickup game here, watching the playoffs there, with a few odd days here and there when he’ll give in and spend some time with you.
That Geek? The guy who fits the stereotype so well it’s as if it were based on him? Graduation for him means looking forward; college is on the horizon, and he’s determined to make the most of it. It also means the end of torment, of being the odd man out, the guy who managed to get a date to the prom, but she’s a fellow geek and they’re really just friends. High school for him was horrible; he had his group of fellow geeks and nerds, but he never quite fit in. But he knows it was just a temporary thing, and he has forever in front of him. Life for him—after college—will be work and family; he’ll risk being a workaholic, but he can look right through those coke-bottle thick glasses and see where he’s needed most.
When life has broken your heart, the jock, the stereotype, will be out with the boys, cheering for his team.
When life has broken your heart, the geek, the stereotype, will hold you through the night and you’ll feel safe enough to cry until you can’t cry anymore.
No, all the jocks aren’t like that. All the geeks aren’t like that. But take a good hard look: when you’re ready to make that commitment, who will be out with the boys, and who will be there to hold you?
So maybe you don’t date the geek right now. But some day he just might be your Knight in Shining Armor, and at the very least, you want him as a True Friend.
And maybe you don’t date the jock right now. Because never, not ever, in your life should you be with someone because Other People think he’s hot. Never, not ever, should you be with someone who doesn’t respect you. And Never, not ever, should you be with someone who says “You would if you loved me.” Because if he loved you, he wouldn’t press the issue. He wouldn’t threaten to break up with you.
It doesn’t matter what your friends think.
It doesn’t matter how popular the jock is.
It doesn’t matter how unpopular the geek is.
What matters is what your heart whispers to you.
What matters is who will treat you respectfully.
What matters is whether or not you like the person you are.
And when it comes down to that, remember: you only get one first time. It should count for something. It should mean something, not just to you, but to him as well.
Like it or not, life will break your heart from time to time. Get to know the people you surround yourself with very well, and you’ll know which one will be at the bar with the boys, and which one will be there handing you Kleenex, not at all grossed out by your red splotchy eyes and snot covered upper lip.