Here's some potentially useful information, boys and girls; if you're ever in a majorly crowded public place and want some personal space, sit your ass down on the floor and have yourself one hell of a panic attack. People will create quite a bit of space while they walk past you. And if you happen to be in an airport and are freaking out about a flight longer than you know you can tolerate, the nice lady at the check-in counter will help your Spouse Thingy arrange for you to get on the next much-shorter flight home, and will get you a pre-boarding pass to get your asterisk onto that plane before you can get too worked up about having to fly again. She'll even arrange for your luggage to be transfered from the flight you were supposed to be on to the flight you're now going to be on.
Oh, sure, you'll feel like total crap for more than one reason and will spend the next couple of hours trying to hold your chit together, but you'll have had that personal space in the middle of a huge crowd.
I don't recommend it.
In other news, we are home and not in Texas where we intended to be. Mock me if you want, but be nice about it.