3 July 2013

Here's the thing... I think it's fairly normal for a person to change their mind about something based on new information, or even the same information presented in a new light. Some people do this quietly, chewing on data as they process it; some people do it loudly, practically shouting in an in-your-face kind of way.

Some take the middle ground; they don't spit it out at volume 11, but they don't hold it in tightly.

I tend towards quiet rumination--by the time I start speaking about some things, like buying a car or selling a bike, I've been pondering it and researching online and whatnot, for a very long time. Other times I plop myself down and write it out without lengthy and deliberate consideration. And then I shove it out into the ether, the Internet, and let people pick it apart or add to it, as they are wont to do.

There's a reason the blog is titled Thumper Thinks Out Loud.

Sometimes I put things out there and then have to take it back, more or less. Sometimes what I put out there is my knee-jerk reaction, and I'm wrong. Sometimes I'm right, but not 100% right. I still write about it and hit 'publish' and whatever happens, happens.

If you Google "think out loud" you get this...

 That's what's happened with Komen over the last year and a half, and it might happen again. I get irritated with some of what the organization does at the national level, and write about it. They take steps to remedy the screw ups, and I have to acknowledge that. I declare myself done because I'm annoyed, but then I get to see things in a different light and I'm not quite done after all.

It's one of the things I think out loud about, because it matters to me. The people matter to me; those who have lost loved ones, those who are fighting for others while undergoing treatment for themselves, those who have benefited from and those who will need help from Komen. No, I don't think I'll ever be 100% content with them...I'm not sure anyone ever should be, not with any big organization. There has to be a balancing of the scales, the good they do versus the stupid--in any charity.

Thinking out loud helps keep me sane.

These suckers hurt my feet.

Call it a flip flop if you need to; I get it. I accept it.

I'm not sure I would understand either side if I'd never walked the walk and then worked the crew. It provides a whole different perspective.

In a little over two and a half months, I'm walking again, but this time for Avon. I want to see how different it is, how alike it is. I want to see how it feels. And face it, with Komen pulling the San Francisco walk from their itinerary for the foreseeable future (they'll bring it back some day, I'm sure...and yes, I'll be there on the crew) Avon is the most convenient option for me.

But who knows? I may change my mind about that, too, once I experience it for myself.

As long as I get a t-shirt out of it, it won't be horrible. If there's no shirt, well, expect public whining. And then expect me to take it back.

It's what I do, right?

Hypocritical, flip-flopping; you can call it anything you want. But truly, I'm just thinking, and letting whomever wants to see it take a look.