11 July 2009

Reason # 327 That I Love Spunky Old People

Every other week or so I see the same older couple wander into the Border's bookstore coffee shop. And every time he asks his wife the same thing: "Do they have scones today, Momma?" and every time she sighs and tells him yes; go sit down and I'll get you one.

He takes his coffee with extra cream; I know this because he invariably picks a table as far from the counter as possible and then finds it necessary to remind her as she's placing their order.

Today I was at a small table near the counter because a group of inconsiderate people took the larger table I usually work from. Really. How very rude. As if they didn't know I would be there, wanting to spread my papers out.

I made do with the smaller table and was proofing the chapter I had red-lined last night. After he asked about the scone, I heard her ask him very quietly, "What is she always working on?"

I did not clue in to whom she was referring until I felt him standing behind me, reading over my shoulder.

"She's writing smut, Momma!"

What was on the screen of my netbook?

My soul cracked open and spilled out onto the floor in a giant puddle of embarrassed Oh Hell No.

And I waited for the certain Tsk of derision.

Instead, from behind me came a small voice. "Can I read it?"

I did not get a refill on my tea today; I waited a few minutes and as they sat down to their coffee and scones I packed my things and left, feeling just a little bit dirty but trying hard to not laugh my ass off.

I did not know I was writing smut. Here I thought it was chick porn...


kenju said...

That's hilarious!! Did you tell them it wasn't porn???

(in)Sain Adventures said...

I can just picture this whole scenario in my head!
~LSP Momma Becca

P.S.-I didn't know that THAT'S what you wrote! ::off to find other Thumper books::

Angel and Kirby said...

Ho funny! It figures that when some one got nosy it would have that on the screen!

las794 said...

ROFL! Completely priceless!

Karen Jo said...

That's wonderful. Of course a scene like that would be on your screen when someone comes up to read over your shoulder. It gave me a good giggle.

Mila said...

XD Classic

*wants your other books too now*

Katrina said...

I love the snippet.
Oh, do you take the loooong 6 people tables? No offense, but single people that take those make me cranky. My knitting group meets at our borders cafe on sunday afternoons.. and there are only 2 of the long tables, and my group has between 4-8 people each sunday, so those tables are ideal. But 90% of the time, they are taken by a single person with a stack of books/laptop.

Anyhoot, love the preview. I can't wait to read it. Though I may have to re-read the other three since I haven't read them in like 6 or 7 years and only have a vague recollection of the story.

Thumper said...

I only take the 4 top if the place is empty...this place has mostly tiny little tables that are fine if I just have my netbook with me but they're impossible if I have that and a manuscript.

Nice thing about this Borders is that they don't care if you take a bunch of the little tables and put them together...but I will move if it fills up and someone needs the table I'm at.

Klaatu said...

My wife laughs at my idea of Porn sites. Maserati, Bentley, BMW. I go on these sites and build cars and drool. Now THAT'S Porn !