Friday

I Bonk You On The Head With My Mighty Holy Pepsi

This morning, sometime between 7:40 a.m. and 10:15 a.m., I was ordained as a priest. I’m not exactly sure what type of priest, but I was running around hither and yon, anointing everyone I encountered, absolving them of their sins. Dressed all in black, I carried with me a Diet Pepsi can with the top ripped off, and apparently my beverage of choice was blessed by the unseen Bishop; I dipped my fingers into it just before popping people on the forehead with a “I anoint you and forgive your heathen ways!”

Then Buddah jumped on me, and I woke up. No, I have no idea what that dream was about, other than my subconscious telling me that I must feel superior to everyone else. But we all know how big my ego is, so it’s not like that should be a big surprise.

And no, I don’t normally sleep that late. Because the Spouse Thingy needed to sleep in today (makes working the night shift a tad easier) I dragged myself up at the crack of Way Too Early to function as a can opener for the cats, and once they were stuffed and happy and ignoring me, I crawled back into bed, thinking I would just curl up under the blankets and watch Good Morning America.

I saw something about Charlie Gibson’s brain, and was off to the seminary.

I wonder how high in the class I graduated…

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