Ya know, I feel kinda guilty--when so many of you are socked in with snow and you're freezing, your toes and fingers turning blue while your nose is numb--feeling the need to share the wonderfully sunny 72 degrees we had here today. It was awesome, really. can't imagine a more perfect day.

A few weeks ago, the Spouse Thingy started taking violin lessons. The sounds emanating from his violin actually sound like music already and not the stepped-upon cat I feared I'd be listening to for months on end. He can already play Twinkle, Twinkle and Baa, Baa, Black Sheep and this is in spite of his teacher constantly canceling or shuffling his lessons around.

When he grows up, he wants to play like Vanessa Mae. She wields a wicked bow, and even makes me wish I could play.



Heck, I wish I could play that on the guitar, too.

She's hot, too. Even I can see that...

William Shatner dancing in nothing but a Speedo is enough to wake anyone up from a bad dream at 4-freaking-a.m., and leave them lying there, too creeped out to fall back asleep.

Oddly, this is not the first time Shatner has invaded my dreams.

I never did get his football jersey and hug...

Fruit Stripe Zebras, Anyone?



Sharon is a pretty freaking creative person, and when I lurk at her blog I'm almost always blown away by the things she paints.

I felt an instant Oooooooh! when she posted a picture of the zebras she'd painted. And I commented that if it was a poster, it'd be hanging on my wall...

...and it was!

Sharon has an art shop. I squealed like a little girl, and went from Oooooooh! to mine mine mine mine!

So now it's on my kitchen counter, and I'm trying to decide on which wall it will hang.

And I really want some Fruit Stripe gum right now. Go figure.

Feeling Much Better... More Oddz N Endz

Amy Winehouse won a Grammy. Amy Winehouse is in Rehab. One has nothing to do with the other, so why are people getting bent about it? A crackhead can have talent. Being a "role model" isn't a new prerequisite for a music award, is it?
* * * * *
Did I miss the memo about the government solving the World Peace dilemma, getting the budget balanced, funding the sure cure for cancer, and dissolving partisan practices? I can't think of another reason why the government is poking its stubby little fingers into whether or not a baseball player was injected with HGH. It's BASEBALL. Entertainment. Unless they found Osama bin Laden, ended the war, championed the end of disease as we know it, and learned to play nice, WTF are they spending money on this?
* * * * *
Dude in the ancient Corolla...instead of hitting the brakes every 3.2 seconds, how about you just slow down? I'd rather have to adjust my speed downward than play Guess Whether Or Not I'm Gonna Stop.
* * * * *
Zooming along at 45 mph, enjoying the feeling of the breeze on my knees and not minding the odd bugs getting splattered on my visor, the theme to America's Funniest Videos started playing in my head. I do not know why. But I wish it would stop.
* * * * *
I'm not going to become an Ink Freak. I won't wind up with tattoos creeping out the neckline of my shirt collar, spilling onto my neck. I won't be a mass of scribbles dow my forearms, creeping onto my hands.I love tattoos and I like seeing them on people, even the massively inked people, but I have my personal limits.
* * * * *
The ink that I do have and will get has meaning. No one else has to understand it, but it's not there to offend or make people flinch. Thumper is cute, but he's not on my arm because of that. When I get the tiger, it won't be because tigers float my boat (though they do) but because there's something in the design that has a deeper meaning to me. And there's a 3rd one I will get if I can't incorporate it into the tiger tattoo, because it really means something to me.
* * * * *
Happy Day After Valentine's Day!

P.S. Bring frozen yogurt, too...

Whichever one of you is sneaking into my house at night and shoving a blowtorch down my throat, please stop. I've missed 2 prime days of riding, all the sun and 68 wonderful degrees, because my throat is on fire and I'm pretty sure my head will explode if I exhale too hard. If you do sneak in again, please bring chocolate.

Bite me...and get off my lawn!

"Awesome! I totally never expected Grandma to be the one getting off a bike like that!"

=sigh=

Oddz N Endz Part 32323232.9

• My editor, she make me cry...


• OK, no she didn't, but she was supposed to send notes that said It's perfect! Leave it exactly like it is! YOU'RE GOING TO WIN A PRIZE FOR THIS!


• Instead she wrote stuff like You're repetitive; you're beating the reader over the head with a single point, you need more interaction between some key characters, and oh, yeah, you suck.


• OK, she didn't say I suck. But she did affirm my own suspicions.


• Today was not a work day. Today was a sunny, warm, go for a long ride day.


• Somewhere on I-505, I think I heard my bike squeal Wheeeeee!


• Or maybe that was me.


• I stopped for lunch at Quiznos, where a little boy looked at the bread crusts I was throwing away, and then he frowned at me and scolded me for not finishing my sandwich.


• He also informed me that since I didn't finish, I couldn't have a cookie for dessert.


• I told him he was right, no dessert for me.


• For the next 30 miles, I really wanted a cookie.


• I did stop for a drink (and t rest my tuckus) at the gas station/McDonald's, where a large group of teenage boys were milling about the parking lot.


• As I got off my bike one of them noted the bright hi-viz yellow vest I wear over my black jacket and snorted, "Your mom make you wear that?"


• I took my helmet off and snorted back, "I am the Mom."


• Luckily, the teenagers had a sense of humor.


• I did not ask why they were not in school.


• Tomorrow is supposed to be just as nice, so I'm not sure if it will be a work day or a play day. Maybe both.


• I really do need to get back to work, because my editor, she's a meaniehead.

What You Don't Necessarily Want To Hear From Your Editor Regarding Your 95% Finished Manuscript:

I couldn't put it down...notes to follow.

This could be ether very good (she was so entrenched in it that she stayed up until 3 a.m. because it was Teh Awesome!) or very bad (like, how can you pull yourself away from a massive literary train wreck? You have to keep reading because you can't believe anyone could write that much crap.)

I'm pretty sure I know what note #1 will be: Where's the freaking ending?

It's in my brain. Sort of. I'll get it to her when I get it to her... In the meantime, I hope she was at least amused by my train wreck.

Parked next to my car in the Border's parking lot was a bright yellow little Ninja motorcycle, and standing next to it was a guy in a black leather jacket with a helmet dangling from his hand.

He oozed oh it's so pretty and I can't believe it's mine! It's mine it's mine it's mine! and I totally get that; when I was close enough I said "nice bike" because when you have a new bike, you want everyone to notice and praise it and offer it crunchy treats and a gallon of unleaded.

He grinned and thanked me, adding "I just got it. The guy I bought it from met me at L&L and we just sealed the deal."

Okay, Ninja Boy is excited and wants to talk about his new toy. I can play. I told him I had a Suzuki and was having a shitload of fun on it. And he picked a nice day to be out on a bike.

Then I asked, "So...how long have you been riding?"

He looked at his watch.

Ninja Boy passed the basic rider's class at noon today and at 3:30 was getting ready to take his brand new ride home.

"Everyone keeps telling me I need to practice in a parking lot before going out on the street," he said. "That's why I wanted to meet the guy here."

I looked around. It's Sunday, and the parking lot is almost at capacity. Brand new rider on a new-to-him bike in an area where idiots operate SUVs and mini-vans...that had the potential of turning ugly really fast.

"Um," I said, cringing internally, "I think they meant in an empty parking lot."

Ninja Boy looked confused for a moment, and then the light bulb went off over his head.

I wished him a safe ride, and then got I my car and left. I hope he made it home all right...

It's gotta be a tiger of some sort...


Click to biggify

Too bad these three are already on other people...I really like #3, but with the brighter colors of #2.