1 October 2025

:::Yet again, I blow the dust off the blog:::

 

It’s October, so pink ribbons are going to be popping out everywhere, friends are walking a couple of different breast cancer walks to raise money for research, and other friends are currently undergoing treatment for varying stages of the disease.

Normally this it the time of year I dye my hair pink and either engage in some fundraising myself, or I cheer friends on while rocking that pink. I love my pink hair, even if it gets me some odd looks from strangers…I mean, I get it, someone my age with hair that bright, but c’mon. It’s just hair.

I’m not dyeing this year, though.

Now, honestly, I would normally tell the people in my immediate life in person (or text, because I just don’t do calls anymore. Saves us both a lot of WUT?? From me. But I started making a list of all the people who needed to know, and it got so long that I finally mumbled “phk it” to myself and decided to just mass-tell everyone, even total strangers who might stumble across my blog.

Don’t get too excited…it’s not OMG HUGE NEWS. It’s not even omg medium news. It’s just kinda =meh= you should know in case something happens.

Oh man, remember Stumble Upon? When you could hop from one new blog to the next, making sweet discoveries, and if you were lucky, a friend or two? That was awesome. And I miss it. But I digress.

Ok, I could find a lot of other things to annoy you with, but I’ll start with some history. Some of you know my history, most of you don’t. But this particular slice of history begins over 40 years ago, when the Boy was a baby—or maybe a toddler, hard to pin down now—and it has not let up until now.

Pain.

Lots of pain.

No, not the pain I get from having a bad back. Not even the pain from Fibro or arthritis. It has nothing to do with brain tumors and the mess that left me with.

Nope. It’s about boobs.

Mine hurt.

Mine have hurt for over 40 years, and despite a myriad of things a bunch of different doctors have tried, that pain has never really let up. It waxes and wanes, but does not go away.

I’ve had docs that took it seriously and honestly tried to find a cause and treatment, docs who dismissively waved their hands with a common “lose weight,” and one doc that decided all I needed was to stop eating chocolate. I assumed she meant caffeine on general, but at that point I hadn’t had any for about 2 years. Still…stop eating chocolate.

Well now. OK.

The last time I sought help, the doc I saw listened, paid attention to the history of treatments that had been attempted, and sorrowfully told me he was pretty sure it was all hormonal, and would resolve with menopause.

I was in my 30s then…looking down a very long tunnel of misery.

At some point, I stopped bringing it up to doctors, because it felt like there was no point. I waited for menopause, and…nothing. I’m many years into it, and they still hurt. It’s affecting the things I do in daily life, and the things I do for fun. I’ve given up so many activities, and was wrestling with the idea that cycling would be one of them. I’ve been slowing down, a lot, mainly because I cannot generate any power with them moving back and forth.

I tried multiple sports bras to no avail.

I’ve started slouching horribly, and now have upper back and neck pain.

Then it hit me (I’m not sure why) that maybe a reduction would at least help a little. With less material moving around, perhaps there would be less pain.

So I got a consult from our doc, and we drove an hour away to a surgeon who seemed promising.

He listened. He read the long “this is why” paper I brought with me. He examined me, determined I have very dense breast tissue, and said “Based on this, I think you would benefit more from a bilateral mastectomy.”

There was no bullshitting around about hormones, or “yeah maybe a TINY bit off the top.” His take seems to be that without the breast tissue, there’s a better chance that this will work. Not just a reduction, not even a radical reduction, but removal of the whole shebang.

And while I spoke with the surgeon, the Spouse Thingy piped up, “I just want to be able to really hug her again.”

So…October 16^th at a time yet to be determined, I am happily undergoing a simple bilateral mastectomy.

To make it clear: I AM NOT ILL, I DO NOT HAVE CANCER. Just tons of booby pain that will (fingers crossed) go away after I’ve fully recovered from surgery.

Spouse Thingy is prepared to help with the recovery. Michelle is poised to visit every now and then, even if just to sit and watch TV together. I won’t be able to lift my granddaughter for a while, but she can be placed in my lap after the first weeks or so and I can still feed her and cuddle her, and not move an inch if she falls asleep.

At about 6 weeks, I can start working out again. I’ll be able to get back on the bike, join a gym so I can swim again, we can speed-walk if we want (and if my back cooperates…this sadly will not help with the clusterfark that is my lower back.)

Two weeks, 1 day, and I’ll be boobless.

Guys, I am so excited about this I can’t even begin to express it.